Saturday, November 8, 2008

Say No to Stress

I'll admit, when I let it, the wedding sometimes stresses me out. Most of the time I keep it in perspective: its only one shouldn't break the one cares what the centerpieces look like, etc etc. And other days I feel like this:

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Well, today I ran across some good advice on Manolo for the Brides - so good that I wanted to post snippets of it here for your benefit too. Here are my top 3:

A Clear Chain of Command Makes Things Smoother. Some brides want the decisions entirely in their own control. A few grooms want to run the show. A lot of parents and wedding planners think it’s up to them to make the big decisions. In some weddings, one person is in charge of one aspect, while another handles something else and yet a third person is calling the shots in yet another. None of these approaches is the only possible or the only correct one. The thing that matters most isn’t who calls which shots, but that everyone involved knows who that person is. Whether the buck stops with you, your intended, someone’s parents, a professional planner, or the MOH, make sure everyone knows it. That way everything that needs to come to you will get to you, and anything you don’t want to worry about goes to the person in charge of worrying. So sit down before you do any significant planning and determine who’s milking which frog.

Don’t second-guess yourself. Make a decision. Stick to it unless you have a really good reason to change. In the longrun, pretty much nobody will care as much as you do whether you carry lillies or roses, so pick the one you like better and relax about it. If you look at your budget and conclude there’s no room for favors, then blithely forget about them. The wedding police will not frog march you out of your reception. If you’re a vegetarian, then have a vegetarian reception without apology. Nobody is going to drop dead from one vegetarian meal. If you think you look like a marshmallow in white, pick a color that you know you look superfantastic in and wear it with confidence.

Remember that it’s the job of the vendors to please you and the job of the dress to fit you…not the other way around. If you’ve got a vendor who is really pushing something you don’t want because of their preferences rather than your needs, feel free to tell them no. After all, if your circle of friends and family don’t drink anything but wine and/or beer, there’s no point in an open bar just because your site or wedding planner wants to sell you one. If you’ve told the florist you want orange and yellow flowers, you should get orange and yellow flowers no matter how much more traditional white ones are or how much more fashionable purple ones are.

You can read the entire post here.



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